Monday, June 27, 2011

Child-rearing Tips- Part 1

So your toddler has started preschool. Splendid. For successful parenting it is important to understand that you cannot and must not leave the entire responsibility of educating your child on the teacher or the school. A child spends only so much time in school. The rest of the day he spends with you and the rest of the family.

Now we know how hard mommies work and how harried, frustrated and exhausted they can get. According to Oprah Winfrey, a mothers job is the hardest job in the world. But do take time out of your busy schedule and spend some quality time with your kid. Remember, “A good mother is worth a 100 headmasters”


Turn every opportunity into a teaching method. But you gotta make it fun.

Try and turn every question and query into a teaching moment. When you go grocery shopping try and take your kid along.You could turn shopping, that can be a chore into an informative and fun time for your child. Aside from the regular fruits and vegetables, most Malls stock all kinds of exotic fruits, vegetables and herbs which your neighbourhood vegetable guy may not have.It would be the perfect time to point those out.

Television

Try limit TV time as much as possible. If you want to watch, try to watch those action and graphic movies with ghosts and ghouls, blood and gore only after the kids have gone to sleep. I love slasher films with chain saw kind of horror... but I only watch when my monsters are tucked in and dreaming. Do not expose them to adult programming at all. Not even the News.

If as a parent you have forgotten some of your old Nursery Rhymes. Fret not. There are lots of videos that teach fun nursery rhymes. Television is not as bad as it has been made out to be. TV can be a great teaching tool. Keep a time limit and always keep an eye on what your kids are watching.


Cartoons like Ben-Ten, Tom and Jerry are fun but only for older kids and adults. Just recently I caught my 5 year old calling his 2 year old brother Jerry while chasing him with a hammer. I almost had a stroke. Some videos meant for kids are way too violent.

A few channels like Cbeebies and Nick Jr are very nice and provide good, fun, wholesome entertainment as they subtly teach kids manners and the difference between good and bad behavior.

Try and have a separate TV for your kids. Mine do, and all the channels that are unfit for kids their age are blocked. So it's either Animal Planet, Cebeebies or good ole Nick Jr. Pick a couple of Barney videos. Almost all stores have them. Their rhymes and songs are perfect for toddlers.

Manners

This is the tricky part. Try and teach your kid to say please and thank you right from the very beginning. If you haven’t, start now. NOW!

Kids are very impressionable and observant. They ain't going to do what you say. They're gonna do what you do. It don't matter how many times you try to get them to say Please and Thank you. Remember they will watch you and imitate you, so if you are rude to the waiter or the maid or the watchman of the building that's exactly what your kids is going to do.


So start at home, set a good example, always be polite, say Excuse-me, Sorry, Thank-you and Please, regularly when dealing with them or anybody, even while interacting with a janitor and your child will follow.

Now we mommies are human too and we do make mistakes sometimes. When you do, sit your kid down, admit you were wrong and made a mistake, and apologize sincerely with a few kisses thrown in. You will set a great example and it will do wonders for your kid's self-esteem and self-worth.

In our home we have spare room which is pink in color and has a 'naughty chair.' And when anybody, the kids or even us parents behave extra bad they first apologize to the person they misbehaved with and then, depending on the severity of the crime they get 5 to 10 minutes on the naughty chair.

The funny thing is at least once a week my husband and I also land up on the naughty chair. (Actually it's my husband who gets punished more because he really is naughty sometimes. Honest! )

Well, getting back to the point, this actually helps, the children think they are not completely powerless, that there is a certain kind of democracy in the house and not just them but every one has to follow rules, and everyone has privileges and rights. And mine behave quite well most of the time, well, almost!

I don't know about the rest of you but this system is working out just fine for us. There is no harm in giving it a shot.-